Food, the Body, Bulimia and Energy for Living.

       

              It's Time!               

             Food, the Body, Bulimia and Energy for Living!

        It is time to start forming another and gentler attitude towards food. We, as bulimics, live a severe dualistic lifestyle that delivers nothing more than exhaustion, depression, lack of control, and obsession.

        One of the first things we learn is that the body has habits, needs, thinks biologically, and in itself has been "trained" by us to have a default system in place when stressed or depressed. This is the binge and purge cycle. Many, in early remission sometimes will find themselves binging. This will come with a weight gain that if uncomfortable or not acceptable may lead back to the cycle of binging.
                                                                     
        I have some suggestions for the initial period of abstinence from both binging and purging. This is what worked for me and is one of many options.


Here's is how it went.

• The body did not recognize when it was satisfied anymore. I would try to eat three meals and snacks a day but it wasn't working. I had noticed that once I arrived at a certain food intake point the body would convince the mind that the "real" satisfaction point would take a lot more food. 

• I would eat until overfull and purge. This felt like my mind had the right "thinking" patterns but between my body, thoughts, and emotional structure I was out of control and unable to accomplish more that a couple of days of abstinence. Approximately 2 to perhaps 6 days and then resume the binge and purge cycle.

• At that time I was also battling low blood sugar and had been diagnosed with Hypoglycemia via an extended blood test. At that time I was encouraged to follow a small and frequent meal program.

• I started to eat small "meals" every two to three hours. And it worked. For the bulimia and the binge and purge cycles. 

• I was able to finally go for a couple of weeks at a time and then finally stopped binging and purging entirely.

The benefits: 

• I started to "feel" better in general because my blood sugar was always up. No more emotional swings. I was in a much better position to maintain a feeling of calm and actually felt like I was making decisions that would last. Including sticking with my new eating plan!My weight stabilized. I no longer started to panic. Fear and anxiety lowered. The meals felt "safe" to my mind, body, and emotional structure. This was a safer place for my body to recognize that it wasn't going to starve and after a time my body started to "trust" me. 

• I did not find myself "getting hungry" which, lets face it, was just code for a bulimic episode. 

• My body lost it's default position. I wasn't able to convince myself that I was starving and really needed to eat. My body readjusted itself and started to respond to my diet with more energy and even feelings. 

        As a society we have been conditioned to eat too much at any one time. In the U.S the restaurant meals and quick food chain meals typically have more calories that any person would need at one sitting. We seem to have come to a place where "Quantity" has someone become synonymous with "Value." Not true. Just the emotional and physical price we pay takes the value question right out of the process. 

        The very first place I went "out" to eat was for Chinese food. I was entirely overwhelmed with the amount of food that in front of me. In the past I would eat it all, then purge in the restroom. Now when I go out I cut the food in half or a third and take the rest home. I do this as a regular habit and it seems to work. 

        Honestly? I don't really like eating out that much anymore. It is a difficult thing to do and at the times I feel vulnerable I won't do it. Yes that comes at a vague social price but so what? Hiding food and going to restrooms to purge after eating in every restaurant I was in for years cost me plenty!

        So I am going to suggest that you give this a try. Even out your consumption of food during the day and see what happens. It is helpful to keep a record of when you are going to eat. I used a timer on a watch for a long time. Every two and a half hours I ate. The "smart phones" have some apps installed that make this really easy.

This may be Your answer to establishing some abstinence. 

I would be interested in hearing how this works for anyone who gives it a try. And I welcome any comments or questions concerning bulimia! 

Stay even.

Bryan